No one buys a home in a neighborhood simply because of the cookies the neighbor might welcome them with.
No one makes their child go to school because of how well the Math teacher relates to their culture.
And no one goes to a sporting event only because the stadium might be full of other fans on that given day.
Needless to say, no one chooses any other community based upon the same reasoning many choose their churches.
Many Christians today seem to believe that the problem with our modern world is their lack of concern for the church. You’ve probably seen the articles, the social media posts, or maybe even the unfortunate rant from a pulpit. But I disagree. I don’t believe the problem of people leaving the church is simply too little concern for the church but sometimes too much.
Here’s what I mean—I think many people, Christians included, are too concerned with their church and what they offer them. Too concerned with the ministries provided. Too concerned with the size of the crowd. Too concerned with the budget for big and entertaining events so that their family never becomes so bored on a Friday night that the dreaded board games get dusted off and dad cheats his way to a Monopoly win just like old times. (Pardon the personal illustration.)
These things are not wrong in-and-of-themselves (besides the cheating, of course), but they are things given very little concern in Scripture. Our community of believers has no Scriptural example if the things listed above are what we find ourselves primarily seeking. An inability to pinpoint the true purpose of the church has led many to misunderstand where contentment in one should be found.
So, what is it that we should make the priority? The same things the disciples of Jesus did.
Then Jesus said to the twelve, "Do you also want to go away?" But Simon Peter answered Him, "Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life. "Also we have come to believe and know that You are the Christ, the Son of the living God."
[John 6:67-69]
Some of our neighbors and friends who attend church might be shocked by the fact that Jesus would even ask this question. “Don’t mention leaving,” they might say, “because our schedule of events is packed so full that that thought never crosses their mind.”
But I don’t want you to read these verses to focus on Christ’s question that day about the disciples leaving. I want your focus instead on the reasoning Peter gave about why he was staying.
It is interesting to note that Peter did not choose to remain with Jesus because he might lose out on a miraculous event. He doesn’t stick around because he would miss out on time spent with the other disciples who had become his closest friends. And he doesn’t even say he is staying because he likes how popular Jesus has become with the people. He simply gives two answers that can be summarized like this: (1) Jesus’ words bring eternal life and (2) He is the promised Messiah, the Son of God.
“But,” you might say, “Peter is speaking of being faithful to Jesus here. What does that have to do with you or I and our concern for other things within our church communities?” Good question. Let me answer it with another question—does your church community faithfully proclaim the words of Christ and is Christ faithfully exalted as the true and living Son of God there?
If your answer is in the affirmative to both of these, your response to leaving that church should be similar to that of Peter before Jesus that day— “Where else can we go? This community proclaims the words of eternal life and declares Jesus as the Son of the Living God.” And if you’re wanting to add anything else to your answer let it be this: “What more do I need?”
In pre-marital counseling, one of the things we discuss is the most common reasons for divorce. Among those reasons is financial debt.[1] This causes me to pose the question to every couple I counsel, “Do you know the difference between a need and a want?” The answer to this is important because many times debt will mount up when we get those two things confused and the lines between them blurred.
Anything beyond Peter’s answer that day must be categorized as “wants” in a church, not “needs.” Peter remained. He remained faithful to Christ. He remained faithful to the calling upon him. Sure, he stumbled at times, but he never completely walked away. Why? Because he knew and was clear on why he was staying. Are you?
May it not be the programs no matter how helpful they seem.
May it not be the people no matter how close they have become.
May it not be the popularity no matter how exciting it makes you feel.
For all these things are liable to change.
But may it be the One who is supposed to be exalted in and through all of those.
May He be enough.
May He be the reason you remain.
And, if He is, He will also become the only reason you ever choose to leave.
Let us hold fast the confession of [our] hope without wavering, for He who promised [is] faithful …. not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as [is] the manner of some, but exhorting [one another], and so much the more as you see the Day approaching.
[Hebrews 10:23, 25]
[1] “Reasons for Divorce: Top 10 Reasons Marriages End,” https://www.couplescounselingchicago.net/reasons-for-divorce-top-10-reasons-marriages-end/
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