“Everyone hears themselves talking but do any of us feel like we’ve been heard?”
This quote for me was the most important in Ben’s post last week.
Ben could have waded into the easy waters of bad-mouthing both presidential candidates and their seeming inability to let the other speak in their first debate. Although he used their examples as a diving board into a greater pool of discussion, he did not stay in the shallow end that is so easy for all of us to tread—pointing our fingers at our leaders as the source of all our problems.
Instead he brought the subject into the deeper end of our own lives and OUR inability to let others speak. In doing so he brought to light what all of us already know—that first debate was merely a public expression of what we see and take part in on the social platforms every day.
How many issues in 2020 would at worst be better off and at best be eradicated if we would all just learn to listen more than we speak? Let’s take count:
1) Racial Tension – Protests have escalated to the point of violence and destruction because some involved honestly felt like they weren’t being heard otherwise. We can debate the merits of such riots but instead I want to ask this honest question—when was the last time a peaceful protest was heard, changed your way of thinking, or even made it on the radar of your attention? Could it be that because of our busy, self-inundated lives peaceful voices are less likely to be heard? Could it be that our forefathers who weren’t being heard by the British knew that tea thrown off a boat into the water makes more of a splash than simply refusing to buy it? When voices of peace feel like they aren’t being heard—legitimate or not, right or wrong—less peaceful tactics tend to follow in this fallen world.
2) Coronavirus Pandemic – With each political side having a different view on what way is best to prevent continuation of the pandemic or for abolishing the contagion completely, neither side is willing to even hear the thinking of the others. For to do so would be to, in Ben’s words, “reveal some deficiency in our own character or our particular camp.”
3) Political Division – The description of #2 pretty much sums up this one as well.
(For sake of time I won’t even go into the ongoing issues of mental health, marital failure, etc. But who in their most honest moments doesn’t think these would also benefit from each person or party being listened to and heard more than spoken to?)
When will the trendy slogan of “better together” be more than a bumper sticker but actually something we believe and live out? The answer: only when we listen to one another as equal human beings with a capacity to bring possible solutions to problems and not seen as the problems themselves.
Reality tells us that never-ending peace among everyone is mostly an answer reserved for pageants but that’s why Matthew 5:9 calls us to be “peacemakers” not “peacekeepers.” Even as Christians we will not be able to avoid all confrontation, but we must be willing to do what it takes to “make” the peace when it’s within our ability to do so and with few exceptions. And sometimes—many times—that comes in the form of listening not speaking.
Now, pardon me, as I once again attempt to live this out in my own sphere of influence. Maybe this time I will succeed. But if I don’t, may I…may we…see it as something worth trying again until we do.
“Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God.”
Matthew 5:9
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