WASHINGTON, D.C.—Newly-appointed White House Press Secretary, Karine Jean-Pierre, filled the shoes of her predecessors with confidence at yesterday’s news conference. Facing her toughest question since being promoted, she handled the nefarious attack articulately and with great poise in a way that all who came before her would be proud.
After a few opening remarks, the question came as oft-maligned FOX News White House correspondent, Peter Doocy, refused to waste any time in putting Jean-Pierre’s feet to the fire. In common Doocy style, his hard-hitting question was asked, “How does President Biden view the fast-approaching midterm elections?”
Jean-Pierre seemed ready to answer immediately as if her response had been rehearsed or stated in similar fashion leading up to every election over the last two decades. Her answer, which will in no doubt find itself etched in the annals of the ages, was clear: “President Biden has declared this upcoming election ‘as the most important event since all of history combined—past and future.’”
Seemingly shocked, Doocy followed up this answer by asking, “Don’t you think that is a bit exaggerated and only feeding the sensationalism of our modern culture?”
Jean-Pierre’s answer was both succinct and simple, “No.”
The rest of the White House press corps present said nothing for the remainder of the conference feeling the weight of the election coming in less than six short months.
Exiting, one journalist who asked to remain anonymous, did put the shared feeling into words when he said, “Many have described elections as ‘crucial,’ ‘ground-breaking,’ and have even compared their importance to ‘having enough oxygen to survive,’ but none have ever been referred to in such strong language as today. May God have mercy on our souls. And may the odds be ever in our favor.”
Correction: The last statement of the quoted ‘anonymous journalist’ has since been deemed a misquote due to its implication that he might have been holding a ballot box already filled with marked ballots. Please disregard that statement.
No comments:
Post a Comment